A letter to myself... from the future.

Lately I've been in a funk. I've been overwhelmed and exhausted. I find it hard to get ANYTHING done even while I'm home all day. Make that especially while I'm home all day. I kept hearing from older parents who had been where I am telling me these are the best years and to savor every moment while it lasts. Well, that's great, but it's difficult to savor anything when I'm cleaning up a mess in the bathroom because someone missed or while I'm picking oatmeal out of someone's hair for the umpteenth time that day. So, since hindsight is 20/20 and I really would like to take advantage of their wisdom, I've decided to try to take myself out of the situation and write myself a letter... from the future. Stick with me here. No one knows how precious these children are better than I do, after all... right?! Here goes.

Dear "pre-school Mommy of 2010" Me,

I know you feel like the walls are closing in and the children have cloth ears. I'm standing on the other side with an empty nest and I want to let you know that they all turn out alright. You will never regret staying at home with your babies. Don't lose sight of why you're staying home though. You aren't making these sacrifices so the tile can shine every day. You're home, mainly, to be a mother to your kids and to raise them yourself. So... get off the computer and go play a game with your son who's been begging all morning. Go read a book to Selah Jade even though you've already read it so many times she has the whole thing memorized and can "read" it with you. Go hold that baby that's growing by the minute. She wont be little for very long. Go.

Very sincerely,
40-something-year-old Me

Sickness?

Welcome to Motherhood - where we measure coffee in pots, not cups.

I have a sick child, a well child, and one that can't decide. My poor sick baby has been sleepwalking. The poor girl is traumatized when she wakes up from running into a door jamb or - as was the case last night - her brother's bed. It sounded like she had been running at it at full speed when it stopped her dead in her tracks at 12:30 am. I can only imagine waking up to someone's bed smacking you in the face out of nowhere. How confusing would that be?!

Anyway, she's in there lying on the couch watching her new Dora DVD that she got as a valentine (Thanks, Granny!) with pillow pet in tow.

Isla is the one I'm wondering about. Maybe she's sick. Maybe she's growing. She went to bed about 7:30pm last night and is still asleep at 11am today having woken up only once to eat. I can't keep the kid awake and I don't like it. I'm having day-mares of her schedule being all thrown off and her keeping me up all night for the next month. We'll see. She got shots on Wednesday so we're showing a bit of leniency. 

This would be just another day in the life of having 3 children ages 3 and under IF I were not sick and feeling like my head was about to roll off and land somewhere under the dining room table. (You'd have to know the layout of my house to appreciate that last sentence, I guess.)

Chris has been very gracious and playing Mr. Mom this weekend. He even made muffins this morning for the kids. Sure, they're a little brown, but they're good and I didn't have to cook! LOVE YOU, HONEY! He's coming right off a cold himself. He was miserable all last week and now he's having to take care of me with no break in between. He drank like 5 pots of coffee yesterday (no lie) and caught up on the laundry that's been pushed to the wayside lately. Yep. I've decided we have entirely too many clothes and could clothe an orphanage. Garage sale anyone? I think so.

Treble Tones

Today I came across a shirt from high school. It was my Treble Tones shirt from my junior year. I really had a hard time deciding if the feelings I had attached to it were positive or negative. Either way, they were strong feelings.

I set it aside and when ALL the other laundry was done, I had to deal with it. I wanted to keep it because it reminded me of possibly the ONLY good times I had while in school. On the other hand, it also reminded me of the worst times too. The times so bad that I actually transferred schools. Sooo do I get rid of it or keep it? What is my first reaction when I see it? Do I smile or wince?

It's just a shirt! A shirt from 6 years ago! What is my problem?!

I finally convinced myself that it was okay to let go of. I usually don't have this problem. I've already thrown away all my old yearbooks! It's not like me to cling to something like this. Weeeeeeeird.

I asked Selah Jade to go throw it in the trash for me. (Couldn't do it myself?!) and this is what happened.

 

It didn't quite make it. She wore it for the rest of the evening and right now she's in there tucked snugly into her toddler bed with my shirt wrapped around her. I finally got it. I was proud to be in Treble Tones back in high school. I didn't want to let go of that "accomplishment." I have so much more now. Look at that beautiful girl wrapped in that silly shirt. I've been blessed beyond measure and this picture really brought it all in to perspective.

Thank you, Lord for my family- my beautiful children. They are my greatest accomplishment.

Happy LOVE Day!

Valentine's Day 2010! Woohoo! Hope everyone has a great Valentine's Day and gets to spend time with the people they love. :)

Anyone know a good...

Anyone have a good (legit) way to work from home? I need to make some $$$ while staying here with the kiddos. Seriously. Ideas. I need them.

On another note, it's getting closer to Noah's birthday! I can't believe he's going to be 4 and starting school this fall.

I suddenly feel very old.

To Whom It May Concern:

When did it become so awful to have children? I've heard just about everything from questions about my sanity to accusations that it's ALL my fault the planet is over populated. Breaking news! Chris and I are old enough to have these children and we're perfectly capable of providing for them without any state help.

I know you think you're an awesome judge of how old I am, but I assure you, I'm not 14. I'm old enough to have a masters degree. I don't want to hear about how much I'll appreciate looking younger later in life after you just scolded me about how "I should have finished high school" before I "had a gaggle of kids." Believe it or not, we PLANNED these children. I know. You're shocked. Hold on to something, I'm about to REALLY rock your world... WE AREN'T DONE! That's right. We want one more.

I'm not going to let you make snide comments about my well behaved children in the stores. I'm not going to smile and avoid the conversation when you assume I just don't know how babies are made. My oldest is very sensitive and I'll be darned if I'm going to let your ignorance hurt his feelings while I stand by quietly to avoid confrontation.

Yes. I have my hands full, but they're happy hands. Yes. I get tired, but it's all worth it.

Death and Taxes

I called the church where I worked for a portion of last year to check on my W2 since I hadn't received it. I start in with my "I worked and I haven't received it" speech and the lady on the phone stops me and says "The lady who prepares those has brain cancer and is dying. We're trying to get them out asap but we have a lot to take over and take care of." ........................oh my gosh.

So now I'm sorry I ever even called. They're probably getting a ton of calls... or maybe not. Maybe the people who have worked there within the past several months knew about all this. I don't know. I just feel awful for her, her family and her coworkers.

Taxes will wait.

Some back dated stuff - mostly from the kids - back through November

2/3/10
::after I told Noah to pick his hot wheels cars up out of the livingroom floor::
Noah- "MOM! Selah's picking up my cars!"
Me- "Selah Jade! How dare you help your brother clean! Stop it this instant!"
Noah- "...wait."

2/2/10
::Selah Jade poots::
Me- "What are you supposed to say?!"
SJ- " Excuse you!"
Me- "It's excuse ME!"
SJ- "You're excused."

1/29/10
Noah- "And on this farm he had a PT Cruiser. E-I-E-I-O With a honk-honk here and a honk-honk there..."

1/29/10
Me- "What do you want to do for your birthday this year?"
Noah- "Oh I'll just take a small truck and a ride on a helicopter that shoots missiles."

1/25/10
Me- "Put your clothes on."
::Noah keeps playing::
Me- "Put your clothes on."
::Noah stands up and stares at me::
Me- "Don't just stand there, man. Put your clothes on!"
Noah- "Oh. My bad."

1/23/10
A family member in Tulsa- "Where do you live?"
Noah (as he's watching Dora)- "Edmond."
AFM- "Where does Dora live? Does she live in Mexico?"
Noah- "Ummm... nooooo. She doesn't live anywhere. She's just on TV."

1/20/10
Noah- "Can I have a pecan, please?"
Chris- "MAY I have a pecan, please."
Noah- "May can I have a pecan, please?"
Chris- "May I have a pecan, please."
Noah- "MAY can I have a pecan, please?"

Repeat those last 4 lines about 100 times. 

1/6/10
Me- "I don't have a bowl I can cook oatmeal in tomorrow morning. I hate washing dishes first thing in the morning."
Chris- "You hve bowls in here." ::opens dish washer::
Me- "You didn't run those."
Chris- "I didn't? Well they're rinsed. You don't have to wash them - just sanitize them."
Me- "Oh... So what you're saying is... I just have to put soap on them and scrub them to sanitize them. I don't have to wash them. Good to know." 

12/22/09
Noah- "Lets watch Pizza Diaper."
Me- "What?!?"
Noah- "The movie with the words. You know... Pizza Diaper."
Me- "Pizza diaper?!? You mean 'Meet the Sight Words'?!?"
Noah- "No. I'm pretty sure it's pizza diaper."

12/21/09
Me- "Do you need to sit in time out?"
Selah Jade- "yes."
Me- "You WANT to be in trouble?"
SJ- "yes."
Me- "Are you just saying yes to everything I ask you?"
SJ- "noooooooooo!"

12/6/09
::Noah went into my room and found Selah Jade's new play kitchen with the fedex tag still attached::
Noah- "We got a new kitchen!"
Me- "SHHHH! The kitchen is Selah's for Christmas and you can't tell her or talk about it."
Noah- "Selah Jade! ...the kitch..."
Me- "Do you want me to take it back to the store?!"
Noah- "But Mom... The mail man brought it."

11/24/09
"Well aren't you just the pot calling the kettle African American?!" - Chris

11/19/09
::We're singing Christmas songs because I've had them playing through the house all day so Noah comes into the kitchen singing his heart out:: "And a partridge in the pantry!....."

11/15/09
::after I threw the soccer ball he was playing with into another room::
Chris- "Meano."
Me- "You were kicking the ball at me!"
Chris- "It didn't even hit you!"
Me- "YES IT DID!"
Chris- "Not in the face!"

11/12/09
Noah- "You look pretty!"
Me- "Thank you!"
Noah- ::gives me a funny look:: "I was talking to Selah."

11/9/09
Chris and I were talking in the living room and Jack, our Australian shepherd, was making a bunch of noise in his kennel.
Chris- "Dog! I'll stick you outside, I swear."
Me- "He can't understand you. Maybe try talking with an Australian accent?"
Chris- ::with an accent:: "Shut up or I'll kick you in the didgeridoo and thr...ow you on the barbie! You got that, mate?"
Jack- ::silence::

11/8/09
Me- "What did you learn at church today?" Noah- "We don't say 'Poop Face' to Daddy. We say 'Yes Sir.'"

11/5/09
Noah was doing something and I told him to stop. This irritated him and he got a really nasty look on his face. Me- "I don't like that face. Stop being so destructive." Noah- (in a really nasty tone of voice, I might add) "Well I LIKE your face!"

11/5/09
::a conversation between Noah and I a we drove past a water park::
N- "Mom, we can't swim because it's getting cold, right?"
Me- "That's right. The pool is closed. You can swim again next year when it's warm."
N- "How old will I be when the cold goes away?"
Me- "You'll be 4. I'll teach you how to swim. Would you like that?"
N- "Yes Ma'am!"
Me- "When you learn to swim, you don't have to wear your floaties."
N- ::horrified look:: "But Mom, if I take off my floaties, I'll DIE!"
Me- "Not if you know how to swim."
N- "No. I'll die." 

Fish

The definition of a phobia is a persistent, irrational fear of a specific object, activity, or situation that leads to a compelling desire to avoid it. I'm plagued with Ichthyophobia. (phobia of fish)

I'm not thinking this is so irrational. See, I'm from Oklahoma. You don't need to go to the coast to find some fish that could have swallowed Jonah in one, maybe two bites; although I doubt he would have lived through it. You can find those kinds of monsters right here in this land locked state in the same lakes and rivers that countless people swim in every summer.

When I was a kid, I caught a gar on my mickey mouse fishing pole. Exibit A...

The one I caught wasn't this big, but a mouth full of teeth is scary even if its only 2 feet long. This picture is an 8'2" and 244.5lb Alligator Gar caught in the Sam Rayburn Reservoir in Texas. The biggest catch on record for Oklahoma is 184 pounds.

Exibit B...

 

Catfish Noodling is a "sport" where morons stick their hands down inside a catfish nest and try to get the biggest fish they can find to BITE THEIR HANDS. Then they pull the fish up while it's trying to eat them. I'll pause here while you question their sanity... 

 

What I hear most often is that they don't come up to the surface. It's really deep. They're way down on the bottom. If they're down so deep, how are these people (without scuba gear) pulling them out with their hands?! The gar in the first picture was shot with arrows while the fish was on THE SURFACE of the water.

Irrational fear? I think not. I will NEVER swim in a lake. Ever.

Ever.